Get My Kumbayayas Out
by epiphanies
Summary: To: New Slayers. Care of: Buffy, Willow, Xander and Giles, the First and Final Four.
1. Default Chapter

Get My Kumbayayas Out

Introduction

By: Emma

Disclaimer: I own naught but the plot. And only part of that, actually.

This is a closing statement (hopefully) for me and my Buffy fanfics. I've decided to quit them, though next year I may develop a couple. (I'm going to start watching Angel and Tru Calling and see how obsessed I can possibly get.) 

This story is going to be in seven parts. One chapter for each season. Let me explain. 

Buffy & Crew have travelled to the next city past Sunnydale, where they find two New Slayers. They sit them down, and begin to tell them everything. And I mean *everything*. Except, its only in the words of Buffy, Willow, Xander and Giles. Everybody else is...not there. In their usual banter and disagreements of happenings in the past, they go over the past seven seasons. In each chapter/season summary, there will be one thing to look out for: the mention of *every single episode from that season*. 

Leave me a review if you think you'd read this. Otherwise I won't bother. I don't have close enough ties to Buffy anymore for me to write this without an audience. This is an audience-oriented fic that will never happen if you don't review. Please. *puppy face* Review, and let me get my last kumbayayas out!

Love Forever, Emma

  
  



	2. Season One

Get My Kumbayayas Out!

By: Emma

Disclaimer: I own naught but the plot. And only part of that, actually.

Summary:This story is going to be in seven parts. One chapter for each season. Let me explain. 

Buffy & Crew have travelled to the next city past Sunnydale, where they find two New Slayers. They sit them down, and begin to tell them everything. And I mean *everything*. Except, its only in the words of Buffy, Willow, Xander and Giles. Everybody else is...not there. In their usual banter and disagreements of happenings in the past, they go over the past seven seasons. In each chapter/season summary, there will be one thing to look out for: the mention of *every single episode from that season*.   
  
  
  
  
  


*Buffy, Willow, Xander and Giles walk up to a house in Iowa. They knock on the door. Two girls named Erin and Leigh answer.*

Erin & Leigh: Hi.

Erin: You must be...the...

Buffy: I'm the Slayer. Well, now...-a- Slayer. *pause, looks at Willow* I'm still not used to that.

Willow: I'm Willow, the witch. This is Xander, and Giles, the Watcher.

Leigh: Right. The Scooby Doos?

Xander: Actually, we prefer the Scooby Gang.

Giles: We do?

Buffy & Willow & Xander: Yes.

Erin: So, um, great. Come in, have a seat...anybody want a drink?

Buffy: Got any Tab?

Erin: You're an addict too? Leigh is -obsessed-.

Leigh: I am -not- obsessed.

Buffy: -I- am.

Leigh: Well, it -could- be call an obsession...maybe.

Giles: In any case, you received our phone call...and here we are. Do you have an inkling as to why we contacted you?

Erin: We're...what Buffy said. Slayers, right? Girls, all of a sudden powerful and feel surges of leadership...all last month early in the morning?

Willow: Right. You - you see, there are demons in this world. Honestly. Monsters. Vampires. And it's the Slayer's job to kill those demons before they - they wreak havoc on society.

*silence*

Erin: I KNEW it!

Leigh: Riiight. Wait, what?

Erin: I, a couple weeks ago, went to the cemetery on the way home from work...y'know, to visit my mom...she's only been there for a few months. And I ran into this guy...he had a kind of screwy face, and was real strong... but somehow...I was stronger. And...and he said something, that could have been "slayer", I don't know...and then he ran away.

Buffy: I've died. Are you me, reincarnate?

Erin: ...what?

Buffy: Um, nothing. Never mind.

Erin: So, you slay monsters? Tell me about that.

*Buffy, Willow, Xander and Giles exchange glances*

Willow: From the beginning?

Erin: Yes.

Leigh: Erin, I'm not sure about this-

Erin: Shut your mouth a minute, Leigh. I want to hear this. *turns to Buffy* Please, proceed.

Buffy: *intake of breath* Well, it all started with the nightmares. Of me, and monsters - vamps, and all of that fun stuff. Then, my parents divorced and we - my mom, sister and I - moved to Sunnydale at the time of the Harvest-

Xander: A great big "Welcome to the Hellmouth" right there.

*Willow titters*

Erin: The harvest?

Buffy: Long story short, the Master could draw power from one of his minions while it feeds and then can break through from their reality to ours. Didn't happen though. Thanks to us.

Erin: Oh.

Buffy: Angel was there to help me through everything -after- that. 

Erin: Angel?

Buffy: Oh, Angel's this guy...a vampire with a soul. A good vamp, you know? We had the classic relationship. Boy meets girl, boy loves girl, boy goes evil, girl kills boy, boy comes back, boy loves girl, boy breaks up with girl "for her sake" and runs off to L.A....

Erin: *blinks*

Buffy: Yeah, anyway. That was a -different- year. *looks at Willow, Giles and Xander* Just started to know you guys...

Xander: Yeah...with the me turning into a hyena...puppets coming to life...killing the master...

Giles: Not to mention Marcy the Invisible Girl.

Willow: Don't get us started, Erin, we won't be able to stop.

Erin: But I -want- to know! What was it about...hyena puppets?

Xander: No, that would have been -worse-.

Buffy: -Oh- yeah.

Willow: A zookeeper guy put a spell on some kids from our school...and they turned into the pack of hyenas that Xander's babbling about.... he ate the principal.

Leigh: Erin., um...

Erin: He's not uh...that way now, right?

Xander: Hey! I may look like an evil pirate, but I'm no hyena!

Erin: Nothing personal...I just don't like the laughing, I couldn't sit through the Lion King.

Xander: Still hurts. *pouts, pats his chest*

Giles: -Anyway-.

Erin: What about a puppet, then?

Buffy: A puppet show - well, a talent show, with a scary magic show dude and a horny puppet that came to life...Kinda like Chucky, only nicer and...nicer.

Willow: I forgot all about him, you know! Aw...he died.

Erin: He died?

Buffy: Yeah. Self sacrifice. Real sweet.

Erin: Oh...ok. Um..wow. You guys have been through a lot together.

Buffy: Oh, sweety. That was only sophomore year. And we haven't even mentioned the dating scene.

Giles: You mentioned Angel.

Buffy: Shh. Giles, that's not dating. That's -tragedy-.

Xander: Yess. Just in case you hadn't noticed, we've -all- had people we love die, Buffy. I mean, Willow with Tara, me with An, Giles and his whole being the teacher's pet...

Giles: What?!

Xander: Jenny.

Willow: Xander! That's dirty!

Xander: I didn't say he -pet- the -teacher- -

Giles: Oh, Lord.

Willow: Oh! Oh, and what about the robot guy?

Xander: *low voice* Me Robot, You Jane?

Buffy: Xander, that's mean. He talked like that 'cause...

Xander: Robot. Robot not human. Robot have no feelings.

Buffy: That's not true! Remember - 

Willow: Getting a little ahead of yourself, hon.

Buffy: Right.

Leigh: So, other than monsters...did you guys learn anything from sophomore year? I mean, we're both in it right now and I don't see the - 

Buffy: Never kill a boy on the first date!!!

Erin & Leigh & Willow & Xander & Giles: What?!

Buffy: *shrug* Owen.

Willow: But -you- ended that.

Buffy: Would you want to be with a guy that -enjoys- being close to death all the time?

Xander: Buff-

Buffy: There are a million reasons why you shouldn't answer that.

Giles: However, away from puppets and love lives...we did do -something- productive that year. 

Willow: Yeah. *wistfully* Killed the Master.

Buffy: And killed me. And screwed me up psychologically for like a year following.

Willow: -You're- the prophecy girl, you can't blame us.

Buffy: Right. Always blame the Slayer. *turns to girls* You'll get used to it.

Erin: Can't wait.  
  


So, this is the first installment. Some of the titles were too wacky to subtly slip in, so I had to make an effort. Obviously. LoL. So, whats your imput? Also, I've never written a story that is only basically dialogue and stage directions...how am I doing with that? Lemme know. I'm a fan of constructive criticism. TTFN!


	3. Season One Title List

Get My Kumbayayas Out!

Season One Episode Checklist

  
  


This is just an idea that one of my reviewers had. After each Season Chapter, I will add on a part that will name the episodes I named, in order of *the way I wrote them*. Not in order the way they appeared in the show. I couldn't do it like that because it would have been way too obvious, I had to get it to flow somehow. Here is the list! (Note that Season One only had twelve episodes)

  
  


The Witch

Nightmares

The Harvest

Welcome to the Hellmouth

Angel

Invisible Girl

The Pack

Puppet Show

Teacher's Pet

Me Robot, You Jane

Never Kill a Boy on the First Date

Prophecy Girl


End file.
